Oh the smell…….

I’ve had my windows open for days.

Today, I woke up to the smell of someone using their wood stove. The air was crisp and for a moment, before I opened my eyes, I thought I was home. It was wonderful until the dog chased the cat into the room, onto the bed, and over my head in a flurry of tails and claws. .

 

October is almost over, sigh. It’s my favorite month.

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OH and before I forget! DO NOT EAT THE MONOPOLY GUMMIE CANDY.

Just don’t do it.

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Yeah, that’s all I got. I’ve sort of forgotten what I came here to write about. …

Catriona

There is a bad taste in there.

Yeah, in my mouth.

Bad, bad taste.

Apple Cider.

It’s my favorite, FAVORITE beverage of Autumn. If, IF it doesn’t taste like it was poured into your glass via someone’s unhealthy rectum.

(I keep hearing “Rectum? Damn near killed em!” playing in my head over and over, just fyi.)

This right here, this was terrible. I don’t even know how to explain just how awful this was.

You know you like my glasses, BTW. I adore these, they’re my favorite.

I wish I lived in a state that I could get fresh, nonrectum tasting Apple cider. Sigh. Is that too much to ask?

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Today hasn’t been too eventful.

It’s nice and cool here, I was able to open the windows. My cats are over the moon.

Annnnnd say hello to Pie. Pie will be in the oven tomorrow, to make, well you know, pie.

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That’s all I got people. I’m irritated and tired and all sorts of under caffeinated. I need to……….hold on my son is making a suggestion…………………Hahhah He says you should all see my necklace…..

He gave it to me several years ago for Mother’s day. It’s a locket. It says “I love you mom” inside. 🙂

He’s so funny. Anyway, there you go. Bad apple cider, cats, and a child with good taste in jewelry.

Catriona

This week needs a junk punch.

Seriously.

This week needs to go the fuck home. It’s drunk.

I swear this week is out to test my patience. It’s like an angry, unmanageable teenager. With a drinking problem.

And it’s pissing me off.

 

Here’s hoping this week ends without any broken bones, or groins.

 

annnnnnnnnd since I’ve been such a downer this is for you:

 

Catriona

My penis can’t hear you

I think I’ve eaten way too many Jolly ranchers. Whoa.

So, does anyone else find it interesting that I received these spammy messages about Viagra  on a post entitled “BRING ON THE CHLAMYDIA!“….? Notice the comment is attached to a picture of a stuffed STD.

Good game spammers, good game.

Speaking of which –  WHY do I ALWAYS get sexual spam meant for dudes? Why? I want sexual chick spam, gosh darn it! If you are going to spam me, appeal to vagina! My penis can’t hear you. Trust me.

Also, I just learned something I’d like to share with all of you. A few of you in particular. Read carefully because it’s important and rather apparent from some of the messages I get that you guys didn’t know this particular shred of info either.

My grandmother asked me what I wanted for xmas as I was leaving her house yesterday. I was headed out the front door at the time and just sorta turned back to yell that I wanted an STD or two, and that I would send her the website for them when I got a chance. As I turned back to continue I almost ran over the postman who was apparently about to knock on the door. He had this look on his face like he was going to die right on the spot. I just smiled and shrugged my shoulders and kept walking. I heard my gram greet him and laugh “That’s my granddaughter. She’s special you know.”

I’m pretty sure that guy was thinking the exact same thing, grams.

Catriona